After a lot of discussion, removing parts, adding parts and changing parts of the script, my group and I have finally nearly finalised our script for our short feature film. But in order to get it to the near finished stage, we made a lot of changes from the very first draft we created. These changes will benefit the storyline and help in developing the characters and their relationships.
One main change we looked at was the use of language by the two young girls, Sophie and Paige. The dialogue they had in the script seemed too old and mature from how they would really speak to each other, therefore we had to change their dialogue in a lot of places. The reason for this change being that in a realistic conversation between the two young girls they wouldn't talk to each other the same way two adults would. By making the change, it will then become more believable to the target audience who'd watch the film.
Another point we decided to develop was that we wanted to get the point across that Alan is the sexual groomer, however we didn't want to give it away too easily therefore we had to be subtle with what Alan was doing. By being subtle we could give away sly hints about the relationship between Alan and Sophie, as seen in the picture below, making the audience want to think about what's going on rather than being too graphical and having a simple, short and possibly boring film.
Along with making Alan's character more subtle, we also wanted to add in the different stages of sexual grooming that groomers would do when targeting a victim. By doing this the audience will be able to witness the lengths sexual groomers go to in order to get their victims. For some of the audience it may also help if they have a similar situation going on in their own lives. In the script we wanted to get the point across that Alan believes he is innocent, and we managed to do this through the narrative both at the beginning and end of our film.
The script itself is now nearly completed the next stage for us is to get some audience feedback from our target audience and see if the script needs further improvement.
One main change we looked at was the use of language by the two young girls, Sophie and Paige. The dialogue they had in the script seemed too old and mature from how they would really speak to each other, therefore we had to change their dialogue in a lot of places. The reason for this change being that in a realistic conversation between the two young girls they wouldn't talk to each other the same way two adults would. By making the change, it will then become more believable to the target audience who'd watch the film.
Another point we decided to develop was that we wanted to get the point across that Alan is the sexual groomer, however we didn't want to give it away too easily therefore we had to be subtle with what Alan was doing. By being subtle we could give away sly hints about the relationship between Alan and Sophie, as seen in the picture below, making the audience want to think about what's going on rather than being too graphical and having a simple, short and possibly boring film.
Along with making Alan's character more subtle, we also wanted to add in the different stages of sexual grooming that groomers would do when targeting a victim. By doing this the audience will be able to witness the lengths sexual groomers go to in order to get their victims. For some of the audience it may also help if they have a similar situation going on in their own lives. In the script we wanted to get the point across that Alan believes he is innocent, and we managed to do this through the narrative both at the beginning and end of our film.
The script itself is now nearly completed the next stage for us is to get some audience feedback from our target audience and see if the script needs further improvement.
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